Lent Photo Project Day 25: Listen

The one who enters by the gate is the shepherd of the sheep. The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice. -- John 10:2-4 


Here's a picture of a hearing test I did several years back. The highlighted area is the normal hearing range; you can see that my "good ear" is there, as long as the pitch is low. Still, I fall into the "moderately severe" to “severe” range for deafness.

Before I got my hearing aid, I typically would isolate myself away from people. It was so hard to interact with people, and I retreated to a quiet little world of books, writing, and just ... thinking.
You would think that the relative isolation past week or so would have led me to a place of deep thinking. Nope. I'm as glued to social media and coronavirus updates and mood-lightening memes as the rest of you are. And as a result, the shepherd's voice has not been quite so loud.

One thing about Lent: it's a time to shut out all of those outside sounds, to take out the figurative hearing aid, and go to a place of quiet and thoughtfulness, and just ... listen. But while I am socially isolating and giving up more than I ever dreamed I’d give up for Lent, I'm also finding that my mind is busier than ever. Not so able to listen.

As difficult as my deafness has made some parts of my life, I think it has ultimately been a blessing. Those many years of solitude and inner focus helped me to develop my writing, and they also helped me to develop the ability to think on a slow, deep level that can't happen without silence and slow time.

I had not planned to write any of this when I sat down a few minutes ago, but I'm seeing that maybe I need to turn off all the sounds and let the quiet happen. Without all of the noise I've been letting into my mind, I'll be able to start listening again, and hearing the sound of His voice.

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