Coins

Jesus sat down opposite the place where the offerings were put and watched the crowd putting their money into the temple treasury. Many rich people threw in large amounts. But a poor widow came and put in two very small copper coins, worth only a few cents. Calling his disciples to him, Jesus said, “Truly I tell you, this poor widow has put more into the treasury than all the others. They all gave out of their wealth; but she, out of her poverty, put in everything—all she had to live on.” (Mark 12:41-44)

This story from Mark has sentimental value to me. When I was nine years old, my mom and I went on a Holy Land tour with a local Christian organization. At some point during those 10 days, I was given a "mite," apparently a replica of "the widow's mite" from this story.

I also remember hearing the story for the first time, told by my school's music/chapel teacher, Mrs. Prudhomme. I don't remember if she told it to us before the Holy Land tour, or if she shared on the occasion of my giving everyone in my class their own widow's mites as souvenirs of my trip. (Somehow, I'd managed to accumulate a few dozen widow's mites in Israel.)

The story always struck me, perhaps because it was so easy to understand: In matters of giving, your wealth means nothing. What's important is the percentage of your wealth that you're willing to part with.

Or maybe what drew me in what the emotional impact, the idea that someone would give everything they had to God.

I was also struck by the story's simplicity, by the widow's simplicity. She didn't figure out percentages or determine how much she could give away while providing herself a comfortable enough life until the next paycheck. She couldn't; she likely had neither a comfortable life nor a paycheck on the way. She just gave it all. How simple! The Bible doesn't tell us what happened afterward; just that Jesus calls her to the attention of the disciples, praising her for her self-sacrifice.

As Dan and I worked on our finances a few months ago, I asked how much of our money we've given away since becoming debt-free back in June. He pulled up our "Giving" totals, and we realized we'd given away almost ten percent of our income. Ten percent! That was a lot more the two or three percent of most years, while more than ten percent went to credit cards and medical bills.

"Let's try to make it a full ten percent by the end of the year," I said, relishing the challenge. And so we're working on that.

But I have to remember that "10 percent" isn't a magic number, and it shouldn't necessarily be the goal. Because it's not just about money. Money is actually easy, even if you don't have a lot: Hand over a $5 bill, buy a bag of popcorn for a kid's fundraiser, write a check. What's difficult is time. What percentage of our time truly goes toward serving God and others? What percentage of our heart?

This is where I need grace, and it's where I need to think about the priorities I've made. For several weeks now, I've gone to bed late and slept late; this has forced me to rush through morning prayer and Bible-reading, and to skip my quiet meditation completely. In the evenings, I'm focused too much on my own needs and less on my daughter's--and right now, she really needs my attention. And with quarantine over and work back in full swing, I've gotten out of the habit of reaching out to friends and neighbors throughout the day and on weekends.

All of this stuff was easy during quarantine. It was easy during the summer. It's not so easy now. But the need is still there.

I realize that I only have so many metaphorical "coins" in my purse. I only have so much money, and so much time. Today I'm seriously thinking about how I can make every one of those coins count toward serving God, whether it's by volunteering, donating money, or honoring the roles He's given me as mother and wife, daughter, neighbor, and friend. Where am I spending coins on my own selfish comfort when I could be giving them away to someone in need?

It's a tough question, and when I ask it, my mind starts to flood with answers, more answers than there are coins. Some of the answers are scary, and I wonder if it's God who is putting them in my mind, or if it's me just being my usual all-or-nothing self. This, like so many other things in my life, is an area where I need guidance. I probably have a few resources for that, but it's going to start with NOT rushing through prayer and Bible study in the mornings!

Typical office fare: Pens, pencils, paper clips, a few coins,
band aids, and mittens (because my office is so cold!)

This photo is of the contents of one of my desk drawers at work. When I use the company vending machine, I drop my change in this little pile. In just a little over a year, I've managed to accumulate at least two dollars--which tells you how often I use the vending machine. :)